Happy

I am pretty damn happy at the moment. It is a beautiful sunny day outside after weeks of terrible days, and the clichéd symbolism couldn’t be more spot on than that. Caitlin had a great first week of school. Now that I’m keeping her from having naps, the seizures are back to being under control. I have no idea why it’s working, but it is. She has been happy to see all of her friends, teachers, and therapists. We even have another assistive communication device for her to use. This makes us all happy.

Professionally, I really feel like I turned a corner. I only have a few more hours of clean-up work left for the MNP project. It has taken hundreds of hours over 10 months, but it is ready. I am very pleased.

I have always wanted to be a writer. I have been in and out of it for over 15 years. It took me a long time to shake off the “artist” myth. It also took me a while to work out my own anxieties and problems. The one real plus of having a medically complicated special child is that everything gains real perspective. Perfection and accolades mean nothing when all you want is your baby to live. Today I finished the rough draft of the first third of a novel. This is a huge accomplishment for me. I also started a new short story. I am not sure where this will all go, but I feel good that I am at least trying.

I really need to thank a bunch of authors who have helped inspire me and who have demystified the process. Thanks to my wife’s work, I’ve been spending a lot of time at SF conventions. Through panels and blogs, I’ve picked up tons of good information about the writing process. So I want to thank Jack McDevitt, E. E. Knight, Lois McMaster Bujold, Sarah Monette, Patrick Rothfuss, Lyda Morehouse, and Kelly McCullough. They are all wonderful people, and they have all had very poignant things to say about the process. It has made it all much easier. I hope that one day I’ll join their ranks.

This should be a good weekend to geek out. We have a big pile of DVDs to work through. We’re still finishing up the new Doctor Who releases (Survival and Robot). We’re also working on The Muppet Show Season 2, and Lynne just picked up Season 1 of Heroes today. It should be a nice relaxing time with plenty of family cuddles.

THE FLINTSTONES SMOKE

Here’s something for the kids.

Mister Microphone

Here’s a little something that I’m going to pick up for our sophisticated adult parties.

Back to School

This has been an odd week. We’ve kept busy, but everything that has happened to Lynne and me is the kind of stuff that is too premature to blog about. For myself, there is still some ongoing political stuff that will hopefully be soon behind me. Otherwise, the personal projects keep rolling. Phase 1 of my Mad Norwegian Press project is very nearly done. I just finished the last big thing for it. If everything goes well, there will be an ad for the project in the back of the next two MNP releases. Lars made the announcements of those books a couple of days ago (AHistory (Second Edition) and About Time 6). I’m glad that they are finally being released in December.

I’ve read About Time 6 and it is fantastic. It lives up to the previous volumes. It will be exciting to hear what other people think.

My not-so-secret secret project is chugging along. It’s nearing 30,000 words. I’m happy with it, but I need to spend some time doing some hardcore revisions. I think that I’ve reached a natural place to step back and do this.

A couple of other projects drifted in during the last couple of days. I’ll probably be working on one of these over the next few days. I’m still waiting for more information about the other one.

This is Caitlin’s first week back to school. She’s an old pro at this by now. It’s the same classroom, teacher, aide, students, and therapists as last year. The only significant change is that the playground now has the adaptations that Caitlin and other children with disabilities needed. I am very pleased that she has a swing that she can use. We worked hard to get this.

Her epilepsy is a little worse, but it isn’t too bad. It seems that the key is not letting her nap.

Floods and Corn Fests

Ah, sweet Corn Fest!

This weekend is the annual orgy of free corn that is our biggest city festival. It was a rough week for DeKalb. There was record flooding. Hundreds off people are homeless, and many people that we know had feet of water in their basement. The Kishwaukee River by our home swelled to over five feet past the flood level. Streets were closed and neighborhoods were completely flooded. It was so bad that Lynne’s work, Northern Illinois University, closed on Friday.

Our own home was fine, but it was pretty unnerving. Luckily, the rain has stopped and things are slowly getting back to normal.

Corn Fest went on as planned yesterday, so we took a family walk to our downtown. Corn Fest is a bunch of silly, small city fun. There’s a carnival, food, free corn, music, and little shops. It’s cheesy, but it’s ours.

We ate some food and then went and watched a fake Beatles band called American English. Caitlin loved it. They were actually pretty good. They did the first hour in suits as the early Beatles, and they did the second hour in late Beatle outfits including the Sergeant Pepper uniforms. Caitlin was smiling, singing, and laughing. It was neat.

As we were walking back we stopped and got a rotisserie chicken from a new Mexican grocery. We were on the fence about getting it until a redneck walked past the store and swore under his breath, “Don’t nobody speak English.” It cinched our sale. It was good eats.

We capped off the evening by playing a pirate board game with our friends Steve and Karen at Borders. I will admit it; I’m a sucker for board games.

Lynne had a gift card for Borders so we picked up The Muppet Show Season 2 on DVD and the main book for the RPG Exalted.

Good Times...

Cats and Dogs

The rainiest year that I can remember just got worse. DeKalb has been rocked by storms all afternoon. Caitlin and I got to wait out a tornado warning in the basement. We were then rocked with 2.34 inches of rain on top of days of rainfall. It is not pretty. Luckily, we only lost power for ten minutes.

Caitlin got through all of yesterday fine, and then she had a big seizure at bedtime. Her epilepsy is still all over the place.

Tomorrow is open house for her school. She starts back on Monday. I can’t believe that the summer is already over.

I was able to make some decent progress on the MNP project today. I am in the home stretch. It has been exhausting and wonderful. I can’t wait to be able to talk about it.

UNicorns LA

This might give the last video a run for its money. I dedicate this to all of my gamer peeps.

Gregorius: NMKY (Finnish YMCA cover)

This may be the greatest thing ever.

Hacking Away...

My writing has slowed down a bit the last few days. I’m still managing to get work done everyday, but it’s been hard to really build up a head of steam. My personal project is up to 24,000 words. I am getting close to needing to do a serious edit. I am at the point where I’m worrying about some internal continuity issues. Hopefully, Lynne will carve some time out for me to get this done over the weekend.

I am consoling myself by reading a bunch of writer blogs. Most writers seem to recommend quality over quantity. I just remind myself that I’m still proud of what I’ve been writing, and it’s not like I have a deadline. What’s important is that I am consistently writing everyday. This is a huge leap for me.

Time is my biggest problem. Caitlin has had a couple of rough days of seizures. Caitlin’s health is always the priority. That’s what scuppered my progress this morning. I can’t concentrate on being creative if my little girl is unwell. Not to mention the time that I need to devote to all of my organizations. Now that summer is almost over, things are getting active again.

I also keep chiseling away at the Mad Norwegian Press project. The announcement can come any day now. The brain trust is about to make a final decision on a name. Lars has been heavily hinting about the project in The Outpost Gallifrey Forums. It will be nice to be able to openly crow about the project. I am so proud to be a part of it. This should be the definitive guidebook to Mama’s Family. Oops, I let it slip.

Logopolis

Things I learned from the Logopolis commentary:

1- Christopher Bidmead loves Doctor Who except for the writing, production, performances, and effects. Listening to him talk about Doctor Who is like watching Doctor Who Confidential from Bizarro World. I do believe that there would be a gigantic anti-matter explosion if he and Russell T Davies ever touched.

2- Tom Baker is lucky that he even knows where he is anymore. I think that he just travels around with a pint and bunch of the usual insane non sequiturs on some index cards.

4- Janet Fielding is still a riot. More importantly, she rewatches the episodes before the commentary. For Doctor Who commentaries, this is fairly revolutionary. I really hope that she does a Chicago TARDIS one day.

I Hate Politics

Must...not...blog...angry...

Actually, it’s now just annoyance. This has been a day of bad communications and weird politics. Mostly it means that some feathers must be smoothed in one situation, and I might have to make a hard decision in the other. I have never been one to relish conflict. I work very hard to keep everything in my life away from it by being careful, thoughtful, and prepared. Unfortunately, all of that messy human stuff with mistakes and egos often comes into play anyway.

There is a big announcement coming in the next few of weeks about one of my secret projects. It will be nice to drop the vagaries. I’m am very proud of this project, and it has been a part of my life for quite a while.

Caitlin has been fine today. It looked like her brain was about to pop, but she kept it under control. She’s been sleepy but happy. Right now she’s in her stander watching some Signing Time. Hopefully, I will learn this batch of signs before she does.

Dungeons and Dragons 4th Edition

Guh!

I refuse to buy new books!

End of the Season

I am suffering from Caregiver Disorder (see Lynne’s blog)... :)

Actually, things are fine. I just feel a little exhausted. Back in my youth, I had a tendency to procrastinate and waste time. Since Lynne and Caitlin entered my life, I have completely changed into a crazy over-achiever that can’t say no to anything. This means that I now have an awful lot on my plate. Caitlin is still always the priority, but I also have dedicated much of my time to charity work. This was fine until I decided to start writing again. It’s now becoming more difficult to find the time and energy for everything.

Over time I will be paring back some of my charity work, but it’s difficult to quit most of it at this stage. It also doesn’t help that some of it has had some nasty political crap behind the scenes. It’s hard to stay motivated in an organization after seeing some great people have some other petty people turn on them. It makes you wonder if it’s worthwhile. I keep reminding myself that it’s always about the special children like my daughter. I just have to keep my focus on helping them.

The writing seems to be going well. It’s been a little slow this week, but I am still making progress. Lynne wants me to do a writer’s workshop at WindyCon. I’m still a little uneasy about it. I do want solid input, but that forum seems so nebulous and arbitrary. I am still very sensitive to criticism. Of course, I am going nowhere if I don’t get over that. So what do my lurkers think?

I have nothing bad to report about Caitlin’s last few days since we changed her med schedule. I would be more detailed, but I don’t want to jinx anything.

This is the penultimate week of her summer break. It’s hard to believe how the summer has flown by us.

I am also now addicted to Facebook. It blows away MySpace. It’s been cool reconnecting with so many old friends.

Summer Weekend

It wasn’t a bad weekend. Caitlin has been stable the last few days. She did have an eight-minute seizure today, but she was seizure free the day before. It was nice to have her be so strong and vocal again.

The rest of the weekend was mostly friend-palooza. I did some more work on the secret Mad Norwegian project on Friday. I love working at Panera. It’s clean, quiet, and has unlimited coffee and wi-fi. These are very good things.

Friday night was gaming night. We pretty much finished Kevin’s wonderful Persian themed campaign. Next up is Cason’s Exalted game. It’s going to be fun taking a break from D20.

Saturday was a day spent with Leanne and Drew. We watched baseball, the men drank beers, the women talked lactation, and we all ate bratwursts from a local butcher (Imboden’s). It was really nice spending time with them. We’ve all been so busy recently that we haven’t really had this chance since they found out that they are expecting. It’s cute watching Lynne and Leanne getting so excited about things like how to battle clogged ducts.

Today the men of the gaming group took Kevin out for his birthday. It was a trip into Chicago for Dim Sum in Chinatown at The Phoenix Restaurant. It was simply divine. You really forget how good Chinese food can be when you’re out in a place like DeKalb.

Kevin is a magician, so we took him to the world-famous magic shop Magic, Inc. It is an amazing little hole-in-the-wall store on the north side. We watched some neat tricks, and Kevin glowed like a kid in a candy store. It was a long but enjoyable day.

All in all, it was the kind of summer weekend that we have been waiting far all summer. I am not looking forward to tomorrow’s return to reality. I am especially dreading dealing with my jungle lawn.

My Daughter, My Hero

I just had some good news about Caitlin. She has been asked to be Grand Marshall for the 7th Annual DeKalb County RAMP Wheel-A-Thon on September 29.

RAMP (Regional Access & Mobilization Project) is an organization that provides services for people with disabilities in order to help them achieve independent living. They do some amazing work as area advocates. Caitlin utilizes their Educational Advocacy services. The Wheel-A-Thon is an important way for the organization to raise funds.

Last year was our first Wheel-A-Thon, and Caitlin won a trophy for all of the money we raised. Much of it came from the very generous donations of the faculty and staff of NIU’s Founders Memorial Library (Lynne’s work).

Caitlin will be leading the march/roll this year. She will also be the focus of much of the publicity in the newspapers. We are so proud of her. Our daughter is so awesome!

Here is the link for RAMP:
http://www.rampcil.org/

Here is a sleepy Caitlin with her trophy from last year’s Wheel-A-Thon:

My Secret Project

20,000 words, baby!

Suck it, personal demons!

Bugger...

Well bugger...

It had been a nice day. Lynne took the day off, and we had a lazy morning. Lynne discovered the crack that is Facebook. Some sweet Doctor Who toys arrived. Caitlin had a fine OT session. Her OT was pleased with her progress, especially with her left hand. Caitlin had fun swinging, won at Uno, and won at Chutes and Ladders. The bad weather stayed north of us, and we were settling down for nice evening.

Caitlin startled out of a nap and needed Diastat for the third time in four days.

The new strategy from the doctor’s office is to alter her drug schedule. Hopefully that will work, but it seems unlikely. In all likelihood Caitlin will be starting a new medication soon.

I Hate Epilepsy

For the second time in two days, I had to give my little angel Diastat. I am nauseous from the worry and heartache. You would think that it would become easier, but it doesn’t. Caitlin is such an amazing, loving girl with so much potential, but the damn epilepsy makes it impossible for her to do anything. Diastat might stop a never-ending seizure and keep us out of the ER, but it still incapacitates her for the rest of the day. We were so spoiled with having the two good years.

I am waiting to talk to her Pediatric Epileptologist. I’m not sure how much more we can increase the current medications. Nothing seems to be helping.

Everybody please mumble a little prayer for her to your deity or non-deity of choice.

Meh.

Ugghh....

It was not one of our better weekends. At least it was predictable tragedy versus unexpected tragedy. The predictable wears us down, but it doesn’t incapacitate us like the unpredictable.

Friday was a day of ambivalence. We had our last lunch with Mary and Charles. It still seems so odd that they’re now on the other side of the country. Luckily, it looks like they will be back to visit in October for the dedication of NIU Library’s new, nifty Scholar’s Den. Still, we will miss them greatly. They are two of the kindest, smartest, sweetest people that we have ever known.

That night was The Kristin Meo Memorial Aicardi Syndrome Foundation Golf Outing fundraiser. It seemed to go well. Some business was talked, some money was made, and we got to see three of the other families. It had been a year, so there was a lot of catching up to do. We all got back together the next afternoon since we still had so much to say. As you can probably gather, it’s always bittersweet when the families get together.

Caitlin had a rough Saturday night and a rougher Sunday morning. After being seizure free on Friday, she was rocked with a couple of long ones the next two days. She’s much better today.

I’m still chugging away with my personal project. Lynne carved out some time for me to hide at Panera on Friday and Saturday. I am up to over 17,000 words. I’ve spent much of this morning doing some research.

I am nearly done with the Mad Norwegian manuscript. It is amazing. It was very helpful for getting my mind off of stuff yesterday.

We had a nice time with our gaming group (Cason, Jen, Steve, and Kevin) on Saturday night. We also had a great time with Sarah and David last night. I don’t know what we would do without our friends.

How is July Over ?!?!

So much to do....

First of all, thank you to the powers-that-be for the Internet. Lynne and I have recently made a bunch of new friends and acquaintances in the Minneapolis/St. Paul area. The horrible 35W bridge collapse made our hearts drop when we saw it. We realized rationally that the chances were slim that anybody we knew was involved, but there still was that moment of fear. The Internet, though, was able to calm our panics. All of our friends used their blogs, social networking accounts, and e-mail to let it be known that they were all right. It was quite a relief, though it doesn’t lessen the tragedy. Our thoughts and prayers are with anybody out there who has been affected by this horrible accident.

Things are chugging along here. Caitlin is well. It’s been an average week. After her awesome week last week, she had a rough weekend that culminated in a hard seizure that needed Diastat. This week, however, has been average. She has had a 7-minute seizure each day. I’m getting afraid that this is just her new, permanent pattern.

In better news, we now have Caitlin’s adapted Playstation 2 controller. We’ll be picking up some games for her this week. I am trying to decide between the Spongebob Squarepants game and Grand Theft Auto. It’s tough figuring out which one has more therapeutic value.

If you read Lynne’s blog, you probably already know about her first pee in toilet. Hopefully, this will evolve into the norm. I know that she can do it.

The projects are going well. My personal writing thing is now at 14,000 words. This week I also attempted some writing for the unannounced Mad Norwegian Press project. It is now in the hands of Lars. I did it on a whim, so I’m not positive that it’s something that he can use. I guess we’ll see.

Lars also sent me the manuscript of another project to peruse. I would like to gush about how great this book is, but I have to wait until it’s official. Suffice to say nobody is going to be disappointed in it.

Well, back to work. Caitlin and the house need cleaning.